Have you noticed how often that happens to people? If they are a romantic interest, they swiftly become beauty we care for to lock away. Sometimes we are the gatekeeper holding the key and other times we are the one locked in while others are locked out.
What good is that?
What does that do to people?
When we are protected with bars and gates, we are well tended prisoners. When we hold another person, we have them as not them, but our will and our possession.
If we are secure. If we are healthy. We will embrace autonomy and healthy freedom found in what my friend David calls willful interdependence as opposed to co-dependence. In that, we can find even more enjoyment because life together exists in a larger area than the contained and constrained area. It does not have to be so cramped and contained.
If what is served at the table is truly good and if what is in the patio garden is truly lovely, the right people will come to it and still be able to go about their day. If loss prevention is what motivates you and you need to cling and contain, you may not be ready to invite anyone into the garden patio of your heart and life yet.